The Breathless Moment Before a New Story


 by Annette Wagner, M.A.

As my body relaxed, covered in rose petals, laying in a tub of warm water, this thought trickled into my brain from my heart. 

The stories that run my life, the ones hidden in deep dark crevices can be changed. My life is living walking evidence these stories change. I know this. I’ve transformed them by pulling the story out of me onto a canvas where I can engage with the story with intention, allowing, surrendering, and altering the reality of what they are. I’ve seen and felt my own stories change on a visceral level.

Changing a hidden story is about shifting the context – most of all MY perspective. My favorite way to is turn things upside down. My second favorite is to walk away from whatever it is, far enough away there is some distance, and then turn and look at with new eyes. When we see with new eyes, we see how to change the story.   

Green Dragon Goddess. © 2010 Annette Wagner.

Green Dragon Goddess. © 2010 Annette Wagner.

When you shift your perspective and change an old story, you immediately make room for new stories in your life. The new stories are what we hope for, what we work for. And so, we usually jump right in building up the new stories and filling in all the spaces where the old story existed and have a grand time doing it too!

And yet, is there something we may be missing by jumping in too quickly to our new story?

I think there is and this is what I want to talk to you about.

There is a precious, magical moment that occurs when you have changed the old story. Suddenly there is this spaciousness in your life where that old story used to exist. An emptiness of cleared earth, bare and ready for new seeds and story. It is like the universe pauses right there for just a second.

By our very nature as human, we have a strong tendency to immediately fill up this spaciousness we create when we release and banish old stories. Structure will start creeping in even without us knowing it. Its hard to keep the space empty and free of new story. Damn hard.

We need to look deeply at this point, the very specific point, between when the old story is gone and before the new story has come in. Because this is the province of magic.

What if?

We consciously pause for a moment…
Open our hearts and listen…
Become completely still for just that moment?

What if we sit in stillness in our heart
In that spaciousness of cleared bare earth?

What if we ask,
what miracle of love and wonder
wants to come through and manifest in me?

Miracles do happen. I know it’s taboo to say that; people poopoo the whole concept or accuse me of catching religion. I don’t give a flying hoot. I know different. Just as I know I can change my hidden stories. My personal miracles include meeting the man of my heart. Finding a home to live in when I had almost lost hope. Being free of pain in my body and instead finding ecstasy. Being in the exact spot to see the sun glow through a mussel shell in a pure delight of color. Miracles are always and entirely a matter of perspective.


Mussel shell at sunset on Pescadero State Beach. Photo by Annette Wagner, 2015.

Which means miracles happen to you too – even if you do not see them.

What if the reason we do not see the miracles is because we do not pause at that one moment when the doorway is open and all is in breathlessness awaiting the coming of the new story? In that precious moment where ANYTHING can happen?

We do not really know what our new story will be. We may have wants and desires and intentions, but really, we do not know. So instead of rushing to fill up the spaciousness with new stories and structure and stuff, what if we consciously, with awareness, stayed present to that space where anything can happen? What if we just leaned into it a bit by resting in the stillness of our heart for just that moment?

What if?

* * *

annette-ocean-bioAnnette Wagner, M.A., is a Visionary Artist, Color of Woman Intentional Creativity teacher, and Art Doctor.  She paints Contemporary Symbolism and watercolor sumi-e paintings. She works extensively with metaphor, symbol, and color. She is also the Managing Editor of the Cosmic Cowgirls Magazine and staff at Shiloh Sophia Studios

Annette studied with American Master painter Sue Hoya Sellars and has a Masters in Women’s Spirituality  from Sofia University. Her background includes over 25 years of hi-tech experience including 21 patents. She is owned by her dancing daughter, two cat beings, the man of her heart, and her Muse. You can view her artwork and read more about Annette

Author: Annette Wagner

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  1. DEAR! Annette~ I think it is so funny that I am reading your words here at a time when I have painted a gag over my Legends’s mouth. She says she had me do this so I will not RUSH to give her a new story to tell but will spend some time with the empty space and LISTEN to her. I keep receiving messages about the empty spaces. Your words here are a catalyst for me. Or maybe they’re a catapult aiming to keep me unbounded/boundless in the empty on between spaces…

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    • Legends’s
      should read Legend’s

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